White Rabbit VI

It has been 5 years since I first wrote the White Rabbit! Wonder how 5 long years have passed and things have changed so much everywhere that it is surprising that except for a few things everything is different. Places have changed and people, yes people always change and this is the very change that the Rabbit warned us about a longtime back but then you realize that only as time flies.

What seems to be a longtime ago, there was a day when I realized that the Rabbit has saved me from the fall I was having. Yes I did have my time and I did nothing about it for a very longtime and made things worse but then there was a moment where it did look like I may have a shot only then it happened to be a dream where I just work up more confused than ever.

Looking at how things have spanned out there was random flicks but there was always distractions and false starts. It is these very false starts which have prevented things from being different from what it is now.

Now that I have realized it but then I am not in a position to do anything about it but then looking at it each and every time is painful and at times all you have is you alone. No one exists but you alone can save yourself and it is this very thing which has kept me going. Where is the Rabbit? Why can’t it guide me at this very moment when I need it the most?

I want to throw the towel but then I always do believe that it isn’t over till the fat lady sings but what if the fat lady has finished signing and you just was not there to witness it so you never know that she is done with it but you still keep think she is yet to sing and you pursue like a mad man. Well there is another though that it is never over till it is over but then after so long it is still hard to keep going.

The very White Rabbit which led me out of the free fall is now leading to me another one. I will do anything to avoid it but not sure if it is a lost cause where nothing can be done about it. Is there hope? Is there a comeback? Or is it just that all I lost and I am hopelessly banking on hope at a time where I just need to forget it and walk away?

How can I do it? Never will it comeback but the cause has been lost and now all I can do is look at and imagine the “What If” scenario. Well this is where my belief comes in and I do fall back on destiny and wonder there is hope after all. Hope is a good thing and no good thing dies but then is it really such a good thing after all?

It may be hidden forever with me and I may be the last person to go away with it but I have realized that I will do what is possible and I will never give up.

The White Rabbit has been a friend who has helped me but then right now I guess I have been left alone by it also, well the time may have come to make some hard choices but then I am not giving up and since it is not over till it is truly over, I will fight till the end. The last stand has already began and it will be on till the last breath leaves this world.